Thursday, February 24, 2011

Drawing Near

Today has been one of "those" days when every plan I have made has gone awry and if something could go wrong it seems it has. Halfway through the day I was coping with 44 ounces of pure diet coke + vanilla heaven with a side of caffeine from Sonic (my best friend and I jokingly call them our "sippy cups"). This day wasn't scheduled to be any different than any other business day - except that I missed most of Monday and all of Tuesday due to dealing with the "DM" and therefore needed to cram three days into one. Those who know me know that I tend to move backward, not forward so by noon I needed to cram four days into one instead of three. No comments from the peanut gallery.

By the way, you can pronounce DM however you want to.... but I have my own version. It seems that just as I'm settling into a routine, life, and getting back into a groove of feeling fantastic, DM loves to manifest itself in some new and odd way. Sometimes it's enough to send me reeling sideways and right into bed. Other times it's just enough to interrupt my life, cause chaos in my "to do list" and also send me right in to bed, as was the case this week. Usually, either way, the end result is "bed"... which is something I despise but am attempting to view in a different light. Two years ago I was in bed every day. Now it's just a day or two a week so I can count my blessings right along with those items on that "to do" list. 

Speaking of that list... I have a beautiful and wonderful new Operations Manager for one of my businesses who likes giving me such lists. Because I'm the crazy blonde with DM who decided to start an absolutely insane second business, these lists are very much needed to keep me on track. The challenge is that I have never liked having a list that at the end of the day still has items left untouched. Try telling DM that (and the Christmas tree that is still up in the living room because it's too heavy for me to take apart!). It has a mind of it's own. Today as I began to hyperventilate over the state of my apartment, the 9 loads of laundry that need to be done, and my "list" that continues to grow,  I longed for the days when I could just "get it done" and that life I thought I had signed up for.

I'm not sure that I will ever be that "get it done" girl again but I will keep on striving. In the meantime, I want to share something I read in my Jesus Calling devotional that really hit home tonight. I hope that it speaks to some of my other chronically blessed friends as well. It's so easy to get caught up in the "this isn't the life I signed up for" mentality when pain levels get high or your energy levels hit bottom and it feels like you are spending half of your life watching the world go by from your bed. Let the following words sink into your heart:

"Draw near to Me with a thankful heart, aware that your cup is overflowing with blessings. Gratitude enables you to perceive Me more clearly and to rejoice in our Love-relationship. Nothing can separate you from My loving Presence! That is the basis of your security. Whenever you start to feel anxious, remind yourself that your security rests in Me alone, and I am totally trustworthy.

You will never be in control of your life circumstances, but you can relax and trust in My control. Instead of striving for a predictable, safe lifestyle, seek to know Me in greater depth and breadth. I long to make your life a glorious adventure, but you must stop clinging to old ways. I am always doing something new within My beloved ones. Be on the lookout for all that I have prepared for you."


P.S. This daughter looks forward to that glorious adventure! I'll keep you posted.